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Funny Messages
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- I know why I am single, my parents-in-law were not able to have kids...
- I like to compare you with a nice cold glass of beer, beautiful colour, perfect taste, really perfect and when the glass is empty I just take the next one!
- I once sniffed Coke, but the ice cubes blocked my nostrils...
- If you have picture where you look old, keep them. In twenty years you can prove that you have not changed a bit.
- This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat, a cat, idiot cat, busy cat, for cat, 20 cat, seconds cat! Now read it all without the word cat!
- This is your boss: "You are allowed to read the newspaper during the working hours and do certainly not miss the job adds."
- My mother in law walks five miles every day, I wonder where she is at this moment...
- What he want, I do not want ... What I want, he does not want ... What we want, is not allowed!
- When I was a dog, and you were a flower, I walked over you and gave you a shower!!
- It's important to find a man who has money, a man who adores you, a man who is great in the sack. It's also important that these 3 men should never meet!
- My feelings for you are like the sea. " Wild and romantic ? " "No, they make me sick."
- Opticians bend your the rims/frames of your glasses for they are too polite to say that your ears are in the wrong place.
- roses are red, violets are blue, frankenstein is ugly but what the hell happened to you????
- Nice perfume... but do you really need to marinate in it?
- A man can kiss his wife goodbye. A flower can kiss a butterfly. Wine can kiss a frosted glass. But u my friend can kiss my ass!
- Hey can u do me a favour, take a pic of urself n send me it, i'm playin cards n i'm missin the joker!!
- Love me or leave me. Hey, where is everybody going ???
- We cannot grant you a life insurance policy because you are already 102 years old. "I do not understand. It is proven statistically that at that age only few people die."
- We will now upgrade your brain.......Please wait........Searching.......Searching.......Still searching........Sorry, no brain found !!!
- A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home
- Smoking is allowed in this area, blowing not!
- The more I learn the more I get to know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, so why should I be learning??
- They dropped your name, can you pick it up ?
- The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn’t it rain on you?
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